Fear would have us believe
that we are the victim —
the one who seems to be implicated
by the evidence of experience —
and for that one, in each moment,
there seems to be a choice:
Love or fear.
In reality, there is no choice,
and hence it is called
Such choiceless choice was lovingly made
before the world was born, before
we took our first breath.
We are the unfolding revelation of that choice,
as well as the perpetual renewal of it.
Whether we welcome the seamless interpenetration
of the totality of universal manifestation,
or suffer any resistance to it, it will do
what it does regardless, and praise
and glory to That!
Ah, see –
all flows fearlessly back and forth
from the heart of creation, the
core of unfathomable love,
sometimes appearing as still
as a calm limpid pool, reflecting
the crystalline moon in its waters;
at other times a cascading torrent of terror
that threatens to tear one’s world to smithereens.
In whatever form it offers itself to us,
the only way to true self-knowledge is
by immersing oneself in all of it
without condition or excuse.
Don’t hesitate —
just jump right in
to your own life with
both hands open and free!
Do it now!
Let the world see, let everybody see
what becomes of the life that no longer
resists going under.
It’s more than enough beauty,
brave enough to ease the terror,
to settle the whole world’s fears.
Start by taking a giant step backward,
prior to the search, prior to birth and all
the birthing drama, prior to the ancient amoebic
sludge, prior even to that Word made flesh and
dwelling among us, as us, as that shimmering
poetry of bedazzlement and bewilderment —
Turn the light around, prior to our big bang
of being-ness, this speechless embodiment of thought-light,
inconceivable and unperceivable, pierced through by
the love glance of itself before mirrors, before any
refraction of luminous energy into the rays
that spark our myths of meaning, the
same meaning we then craft into
the ephemeral fractions of light
and shadow that we take
ourselves to be.
Be prior to any meaning, prior to fear,
prior to any motion in this ocean of eternal life,
prior to life, the Emptiness Mother, prior to the play
of Maya, prior to Shiva’s first heartbeat for Shakti,
before the orchestra is ever hired, let’s be done
with all waiting and slip off the branch
of this rootless tree.
What happens then is nothing, really —
no blame, no shame, no bright flame burning
in love’s deep dark, no people’s park, no sizzling
quark, no mad dog barking down the block,
no alarm because no clock, no you nor
me, not bound nor free, not dull nor
keen, not what it seems,
this waking dream —
just innocence wafting
on the hint of a breeze, gently
toying with a falling leaf, now drifting
silently in the dark, a sight unseen,
a love supreme . . .
“I had always heard your entire life flashes in front of your eyes the second before you die. First of all, that one second isn’t a second at all, it stretches on forever, like an ocean of time . . .
I guess I could be pretty pissed off about what happened to me . . . but it’s hard to stay mad, when there’s so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I’m seeing it all at once, and it’s too much, my heart fills up like a balloon that’s about to burst . . . and then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain and I can’t feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life… You have no idea what I’m talking about, I’m sure. But don’t worry… You will someday.”
~Lester Burnham, American Beauty